Drumming Addiction and Withdrawals

Hollywood Jim

Platinum Member
A forum member asked me to describe how it felt to stop playing the drums for as long as I did. Please forgive me if this post sounds self-promoting, but I thought my experience was worth sharing. I will try and keep this short.

My father was a drummer and he was my drum teacher. My Father taught me all about how hard it is to make a living in the music industry. My Father had a day job as a carpenter. At a young age I had decided I wanted to get married and raise a family, so I worked hard at a backup plan. I went to college to become an electrical engineer.

The first pictures I have of me playing the drums was at age 3 in 1953. For me playing drums was just as natural as walking or breathing. I practiced playing the drums for many hours a day. As I grew up my drumming skills were in great demand and starting at age 15 I played with several bands. In 1971 at age 21 I had not gotten that "big break" in the music industry and I was about to graduate from college as an electrical engineer. Thanks to the US military lottery system I was also about to get drafted into the Army. I did not want to go to Viet Nam, so I joined the Navy. (I was sent to Viet Nam anyway. LOL )

When I went into the Navy I stopped playing the drums. I was stationed on a ship in the Pacific Ocean for three years.

Quitting the drums was very very difficult for me. Obviously being on a ship for 3 years helped keep me away from the drums. The withdrawal pains were severe. They went on for about four or five years. There were physical and emotional pains. Whenever I heard a song that I thought would be fun to play drums with I would start to break out in a cold sweat. I would get a knot in my stomach. I would start to cry. I would try and get away from the music and close my eyes, clench my fists and wait for the feeling to pass. As time went on the time crying and sweating would get shorter and shorter.

During this time the thought of drumming made me very sad and depressed. I had given it up so I could be a good husband and father. As long as I kept away from my favorite music I was able to manage it. The depression finally went away. Eventually after a few years the desire to play the drums finally became a manageable thing. I found I could live without it.

However, I always found myself tapping on the table and bouncing my feet to the music. My wife always makes me stop. I used to make the car bounce to the music using the brake while waiting for the light to change. My kids loved that, my wife hated that.

Funny thing all of these years I kept the new 1963 Slingerland set my Father brought for me when I was 13 years old but never played it after I joined the Navy. (Except for a couple of church functions)

Now 42 years later at age 63 I started playing again. I am loving it. Just like I never stopped. I’m addicted again. But this time I won’t stop until I can’t physically play anymore.

By the way I am so thankful to all of you forum members. I have learned a lot from you about drumming in the modern world. When I started playing the drums again I was very ignorant about all of the new equipment and drumming things that have been invented in the last 40 years.

Thank you.

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Jim,

Thanks for telling your story. I stopped playing also for a while and am back into it now. I did a mechanical engineering degree after the army.
 
Beautiful story, thanks for sharing. After leaving the Navy was there no way to shoehorn playing music back into your life? That's a real bummer.
 
Proves to me that you were a born drummer. Great story Jim. As John Lee Hooker says in "Boogie Chillun"... it's in him and it gots to come out.
 
Proves to me that you were a born drummer. Great story Jim. As John Lee Hooker says in "Boogie Chillun"... it's in him and it gots to come out.

Ha, perfect.
Yeah, I could have shortened my whole story to "it's in me and it gots to come out."

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Beautiful story, thanks for sharing. After leaving the Navy was there no way to shoehorn playing music back into your life? That's a real bummer.

Well, I got married after the Navy and you know the problems:

Raising three kids with very little money
Having to spend late nights in bars
Playing music on all the holidays
No practice space
Making noise for the neighbors
Moving from Hollywood to Phoenix and re-connecting with the small Arizona music scene

Work - spend time with the wife and kids - eat - sleep - work - spend time with the wife and kids - eat - sleep - work - etc.

Being a drummer is quite different than being say a piano player when it comes to practicing and playing.

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My first instrument is drums, and then in the army I taught myself the saxophone. However, both instruments are loud and louder. I could not play those instruments while living in an apartment. It was only after I bought a house that I was able to play again. Now learning the piano that is an electronic device, but it has not always been as easy as this.
 
Congrats! I was drafted before the lottery system came into play and fought on the MeKong
Delta of VietNam then returned home to get a BS degree in electrical engineering too. I wanted to get married at the time and having "checked out the music scene carefully" believed that I would struggle as a full time musician, so went that route. It's a tough call though, some of my close buddies became very successful international musicians and others are struggling each day. I am thrilled that once again I get to play music full time and know you will be too. Locally there are a lot of new older faces on the music scene, excellent musicians too, retired scientists, doctors, engineers, teachers...you name it. We had similar paths. It's great you kept your drum set, I wish I had my first set.
 
Great story -

Although my experiences are a little bit different (I'm younger and did not have to give up the drums for as long as you), I too was "addicted" for many years and played in bands and did some recordings in my teens. I then went away to university, practiced law, started a family etc. and stopped playing for about 20 years. There wasn't a day that went by during those 20 years where I didn't think about drums. Seeing anyone play drums, going into a music store, or even listening to music I used to play along triggered feelings of despondency and loss.

I sometimes wonder if I turned my back on my true calling as I don't think it was normal to have been in "withdrawal" for so long?

Although I live quite comfortably and I have the luxury of looking at drums as a hobby and not something I am completely dependent on to support my family, I have nowhere near the amount of passion for my day job that I do drums. I wonder if working drummers see drums as their job/professions and have other hobbies they are more passionate about?

Nevertheless, I got back into drums roughly a year ago and surprisingly the learning curve has not been as steep as I thought. Although I can't practice for 4-5 hours at a time anymore, I am much more disciplined and strategic about what I do behind the kit and I have a great teacher I see most weeks who helps me think in terms of weekly/monthly/yearly goals. Further, despite having a busy job and a young child, I made a promise to myself that I would always pick up the sticks every day, even if it was nothing more than hitting the practice pad for 10-15 minutes and working stick control or stone killers. There is no reason why we all can't commit to that amount of time (we all sit on the can after all!) which at the very least will help us keep what we have.

Anyway, sorry for my long discourse, but your eloquently told story really moved me and I suspect there are many on the forum who felt like you did.
 
Hi All! I can really relate to this topic as I have definitely experienced it in the 70's myself! Started playing drums at about 10 or 11 and played a lot with lessons for about 6 years in a small band as well and then came alcohol and drugs and I was lost until I was in my late 30's and obviously my drumming which was so important to me was lost too! I got a great Ludwig kit in 1967 which stayed covered in the basement for years . I became that guy that used to say "I used to play the drums, but......." And then once in a while I would venture downstairs and hop on an untuned kit that was dusty and needed a good cleaning . The old "itch" was still there, but the motivation wasn't! Long, boring story cut way short. At 57 I bought a practice pad and marching sticks and started playing rudiments. It took months to start feeling the old chops come back a little, but somehow , I stuck to it. By now I lived in a townhouse so my drums were stored 3 hours away at my sisters . One weekend , armed with new heads, I went down and set my drums up and cleaned them including all the chrome, replaced the heads keeping all the original and guess what happened. I am playing again. I took the Ludwigs home and stored them, bought an e kit, and eventually sold it , bought a 2 box module and put mesh heads and triggers on the Ludwigs and now at 61 I am playing the my Ludwigs . I could kick myself in the ass,for not continuing to play straight thru for all those years , but nothing positive comes out of that . What's funny is my family , who always said I should play again, hates me playing and think I am heading for a looney bin, and I know that I have already been there,lol
 
The horrors of addiction alright- thanks for sharing Jim!
I can't imagine being stuck on a ship for 3 years without drums....
 
Great story Jim!

Thru the magic of the internets, I have heard the same basic story many times.

We loved drums and music.
We tried to earn a living doing it.
We decided we should probably get a real job.
We were always thinking about music./drums
We finished our real jobs
We went back to doing what we wanted to do in the beginning.

In my case (I'm a year younger than Jim and I started back up three years ago) after a 3 decade sabbatical, I have learned more this time around than I ever did before.

The only thing I don't like these days is hauling gear, working 9 to 1, then hauling it home. That is like a full days work and you don't get to sleep until 3AM. In the olden days I would do it and then often get up for work the next morning.

I was drafted before the lottery system came into play and fought on the MeKong Delta

Ahhh...., August 5th, 1971. It was one of the best days of my life. #266. I had been dreading the draft since I was 15. Wannabe Hippies don't make good soldiers :)
 
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I stopped for 32 years. The drive was always there but not the opportunity. One of the last things my sister said to me, on her last visit before passing was , "you need to get some drums" I think she was tired of my dashboard drumming. Back when I was younger it would have been nice to make a few dollars gigging, but now, my audience is my Zoom recorder.
 
Yikes and I thought a band mate going on vacation for a month was bad. Atleast I still had my trusty practice pad! Definitely helped with the shakes haha.
 
I’m resurrecting this thread with a new question.

How addicted are you to playing drums in a band?
How much trouble will you go through just to play drums for an audience?

Last night I was sitting at home and felt the need to play drums. I found an open mic jam night on the internet and I went to it.
They had a killer house band. I got there at 8pm and I was the first drummer to sign up. The band started playing at 9 pm. They put me on in third place.
They had me play two songs at 11:15 pm. I felt great while I was playing. I played with some great musicians.

The club was about an hour from my home. I left home at 7pm, I got home at 12:30 pm.
I’m thinking playing the two songs was probably not worth the time spent.

Sometimes I hate being addicted to playing the drums. How addicted are you?

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I'm fully addicted. On my 20 year break however, (1984 to 2003) I didn't really think about drums, I had a mission to accomplish (learn how to make money), so I had to shut it off. I did listen to blues constantly during that time.

After my business got a life of it's own, all of a sudden one day I missed drumming like really bad. 2 years prior, a major relationship had ended, so I was single and free to fly again. So all the necessary elements were aligned. I had my money making vehicle, a place to practice anytime, and the desire came flooding back. That was in 2003.

This past June, I spent 500 dollars on a tiny Sonor Players drumset plus new heads and stuff so I could do a blues festival (extremely tiny stage area) for no pay. I used the kit for one gig and in my studio it sits. I wanted to play this event, period. I shoehorned my way into the gig, it was supposed to be a duo, just guitar and bass. I informed the leader I was going to get a drumset that would fit and I was going to play and he didn't have to pay me. They got paid, I did it because I wanted face time at this event.

Nowadays, thoughts of drums and drumming occupy every free moment my brain has. I am fully addicted with no hope of recovery lol.
 
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I felt great while I was playing. I played with some great musicians.

The club was about an hour from my home. I left home at 7pm, I got home at 12:30 pm.
I’m thinking playing the two songs was probably not worth the time spent.

Now you've lost me. I can't think of a better way to spend time.

The people you played with are probably thinking "That drummer was GOOD! I'm so glad I went!"
 
I'm okay for one day without playing music.

Two days is pushing it. I want to play badly.

Three days is when I start to get an almost physical "itch". It's like built up energy that needs to get out.

After that, it's all downhill and I'm un-happy. I space my rehearsals, shows and jams at regular intervals so I don't get too far gone. Even so, I never ever stop thinking about it. Tunes in my head, playing mock bass n hats with my feet while I work, tapping while I'm in a movie or watching TV... Pads all around the house...
 
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