I've experienced both sides, having spent the bulk of my time as a drummer self-taught, and then going on to learn rudiments and how to read music when I started taking jazz drumming lessons 3 years ago. People should play and enjoy themselves, and use whatever methods work for them. My nephew has lost interest in drumming, in no small part due to watching "drum covers" on youtube and bemoaning the fact that he thinks he'll never be able to do stuff like that - when I was his age I was just happy to bash the crap out of my drums, playing along to punk records and starting my first bands - we sounded terrible and we didn't care, it was punk and we could do what we liked. Because of that enthusiasm we kept at it, and lo and behold we each got better on our instruments. I wish my nephew could have experienced the joy of making a racket with mates, and creating stuff, (even if it isn't very good) before he started comparing himself to super technical players. Not saying he shouldn't aspire to advance his playing, just that he seems to have missed out on the sheer enjoyment of hitting stuff first, to foster that relationship with the drums that would carry him forward.